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5 Traits for Men to Develop by Going on Solo Travel to Build Strong Emotional Resilience
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One of the most valuable yet difficult lessons for young men to learn is cultivating emotional detachment, which in men is called stoicism. It is a trait that can really make you stand out from the crowd in a very positive way, especially as men become more and more feminized.
In this essay, I want to approach the topic of solo travel from a personal growth mindset. How does leaving your familiar environment and seeking out the world with no plan or idea, other than maybe your next two stops, affect you psychologically as a human being? What can you learn from the experience of not knowing where you will be in two months? And why should you even consider leaving everything behind, especially when you are clueless as to what you want in life or how to improve your current life situation? Well, there is a reason why ancient tribes used to have initiation processes for men as a rite of passage that marked the transition from boyhood to manhood.
Here are five traits that you can expect to develop as you voluntarily choose to leave home behind and conquer the world:
Trait 1: Self-Awareness through self-inspection and observation
You are going to spend a lot of time alone, no matter how extrovert you are.
This can be tough at times. I personally struggled a lot with loneliness during my adult life, and ironically, I would always put myself in situations in which I would consequently end up alone. This made me question all sorts of things about myself and my worth as a human being. Becoming aware of this negative self-talk eventually pushed me towards spirituality, photography as a form of creative art, meditation, and other “healthy” coping mechanisms like exercise and quitting substances all together. However, this only works if you can consciously let go of negativity by leaning into it.
Most people never get out of their bubble of perceived security, which they exchange for true freedom and a life well lived. This is sad.
Trait 2: Solo travel is mental survival training in its purest form
Where you put your focus is where your energy goes, and that is where growth will happen, regardless of its nature or quality.
Adaptability is the ability of an organism to survive, making it essential from an evolutionary standpoint. Not settling down and moving from one place to another is actually a form of survival training in its purest form, as it forces your brain to adapt again and again to new environments. This is resilience and personal growth at their best.
Becoming okay with not knowing what is next is a powerful tool to build resilience and become more spiritually aware and detached.
Trait 3: Becoming friends with the Law of Impermanence
Continuously letting go of good and bad situations and relinquishing negativity while being able to appreciate small things as they happen is a spiritual practice worth engaging in.
Nothing lasts forever, yet here we are all the time, trying to cling to outcomes and situations, unwilling to accept their impermanent nature. We don’t want to lose friends, family, or material things, and the older we get, the scarier it gets. If you travel, you know that you will probably only see this place, the people, birds, and smells once or maybe twice for a short time before you move on. This makes the whole experience more valuable; in fact, it makes it special as opposed to your 9-to-5 routine of a life that you never consciously chose in the first place but was chosen for you.
Becoming a nomad and solo traveler means becoming friends with the true impermanent nature of all things, including life.
Trait 4: Detachment
How often in life do we confuse love with attachment?
In my life, and I am 46 years old, I don’t know how many opportunities to truly love I have wasted, not because I didn’t want to, but because I thought becoming attached was a form of love. Of course, nothing could be further from the truth. It got to the point where I was so deeply afraid of abandonment that it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. Now, I have just abandoned the whole idea of needing anything to be a particular way, and I just try to distill some lessons from it so you don’t have to.
It is ok not to know the outcome of a day; control is an illusion anyway
Trait 5: Appreciation of Small Things
Appreciate the small things in life is a common phrase for a reason
But it is a lot easier to do when you are able to experience new stimuli and don’t have to undergo the same boring routines every day. Here is today’s anecdote: I just arrived the night before here in Nusa Dua, and today in the morning, I checked out the area to find a gym where I could do some weight pulling. It turned out I was the only guy except for one other stranger and a dog that was so happy to see me that it couldn’t stop jumping around me and my weights.
That little dog made my day; everything else is a plus.
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